In a marriage you have good moments and bad moments pretty much throughout your day. There are things that are going to drive you crazy about the other person that is going to get on your nerves or cause you to question, God what are you really doing?
God doesn’t say that this would not happen. In fact, His Word tells us to take one day at a time. He equips us with what we need as each situation occurs. He just gives us the strength, courage, and patience to endure, but also He uses these situations to grow us up and to work on your character to mold you to become what God created you to be. His Word states that “iron sharpens iron” so we also need to understand God will use our lessons to work on our spouse as well.
When things happen that you don’t necessarily understand or like, you have choices to make on how we respond or react to each situation. We need to remember that our love needs to be like the love of Jesus and that is UNCONDITIONAL. Our love cannot waiver because of something we do not like.
When you walk in unconditional love, you will walk in forgiveness. You will not “write” down or keep track of all the wrongs that take place. Will things hurt or upset you? Yes. This is not where sin takes place. The sin takes place or takes root is when you hold onto these wrongs or hold them against your spouse in unforgiveness. In fact, when you contain a “record of wrongs” against your spouse, you are doing exactly what the devil does to accuse an individual in the Heavens Courts.
You may be surprised how often you may hold onto something that happens, that may not even seem that big. It is important to empty of all of it so that nothing lingers. There is a reason why God puts in His Word to not go to be angry. God wants you to release it to Him so that it doesn’t grow a root or weed in your life.
The Word of God instead says that we should pray for those who come against us, hurt us, curse us, and does wrong against us. And who does the enemy use the most to do this, our loved ones – our spouses. What better way to fight this kind of attack then to pray for them.
Bring to God the situations, and be real with God. Let Him know how it feels and do not be afraid to bear your heart out to Him. He knows it is there but there is just something about confessing it to God that helps you release it to Him. Then when you have release all this to Him, you can pray for your spouse clearly and unhindered by those toxic emotions.
It is when you can truly pray for your spouse that you will be able to see God’s Hand moving in their lives and the “bad” moments may not go away but are so much easier to deal with and handle because you are not holding onto any other garbage.
This week focus on really pouring out your heart to God and releasing any of that garbage you may be carrying around. Allow God to drain you of any bitterness that may have been collected from the bad moments so that you can enjoy more of the good moments with your spouse. Release any “records of wrongs” that you have against your spouse. As you release these things to God, allow God to fill you with true joy, peace, and patience to give you a new strength to endure new moments that will come.
Ask God to renew and strengthen your love for your spouse and to enlighten you on how to pray for your spouse this week. Take time to be quiet before the Lord and listen. He will tell you where your prayers need to be focused on for them. When you get out of your feelings and allow God to reveal things you will see past what your eyes see and see the ‘unnoticed’ things.
Throughout today there are things that (my spouse) has done that has hurt me or that I do not understand. Here are things that bothers me and why it bothers me. (List those things)
Please forgive me God for holding any of this against my spouse and I forgive them for their actions against me. Increase my love for them so that I can walk in unconditional love towards them just as you do. I understand God that sometimes to walk in unconditional love at times is hard and can require me to walk in different facets of this love and I ask for wisdom of what love is needed for each situation.
God, as I am learning these things, help me to completely release any little thing that would try to hide or stay behind and increase my trust in You. Let me see that as I am doing this for my spouse, I am also doing this for You and drawling me closer to you and trusting you through this process.
Flush me out with your Holy Spirit and Living Water so that I can be the spouse you have called me to be as I sit here before you. Saturate me with Your presence and shine Your light on anything that is sticking around.
- Once you pray this, give God that time to cleanse you. Don’t be in a hurry or look at this as a quick fix. Let the process really go deep so that you can reach a new level in your walk with God and in your marriage.
- After you feel a release and have been cleanse, you can add the second part of this week’s focus. Sit quietly before the Lord to hear about what your spouse needs prayer and support for and what God’s plans are for them.)
I bring before you (my spouse). In the bad moments that takes place in our daily lives, effect more than me. God I am asking you to show me where my prayers can be focus on when it comes to my spouse so that I can pray for them properly. Show me their heart and needs as you see them. Drawl them closer to you God and I sit and listening for Your instructions on what You have to say and instructions of my part You want me to play in their lives.
In the Name of Jesus – Amen
- Then sit there and listen and write down what you hear. This will not only help you pray for your spouse differently and see them differently but it will also increase your relationship with God and release that you do hear His voice and He does want to speak to you.
Have a wonderful and blessed week and may you be more aware of the “good” moments that each day brings.